…Questions answered from http://www.AskRhadi.com

Keep ‘em coming

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Question
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Once again, I’m 17 years old, my name is xxxxx, and I need some guidance.

I’m what you would call a quitter. I’ve quit every sport I’ve played, from baseball to tae kwon do. I even quit during the middle of a tough workout. And I usually quit just as I’m about to achieve a goal, for example, I quit tae kwon do when I was a red belt, one away from black.

I have a goal to one day be an Airborne Ranger in the Army, but I wouldn’t want to join the Army and sign a contract, if I wasn’t sure I would make it. If I was sure I wouldn’t quit. As I said, I quit in workouts, so what would say that I could make it through weeks of pain and workouts to achieve the goal, nothing.

I hate being a quitter, but I don’t know another way I guess. I’ve done it since I was a little kid playing baseball. I especially hate it when my parents are disappointed in me quitting. I love them, and I want to make them happy, and they’re supportive of me, but once I want to quit something, they never approve. They try to teach me that I’m making mistakes by quitting and try to keep me from doing it, but I don’t know what comes over me to make me do it.

The only thing I haven’t quit was school. I want to go to a good college one day, so I know I have to do it. Also I started Krav Maga and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu about a year ago, but I’m even starting to slack off there.

I guess I just need some words of wisdom. What makes you have that drive to do something. I know people get a drive off being called a quitter, and want to prove people wrong, but I’ve never had that feeling before. I just seem to not care when someone calls me a quitter, even though I hate it.

I can’t go a head in life like this. You can’t become successful by quitting. I know this. But I don’t know what to do, what to change, and how to change it. I guess I just need some help.

You’re the person I wish to be, successful, happy, and much more.
Thanks for reading and responding,

Thanks for your question. Now you asked me this question so I’m going to be 100% completely honest with you.

First off. Your parents are partly at fault for this quitting issue. They should not tolerate you quitting nor allow you to quit. And the reason why I’m telling you this is because one day you may have some children or be the caretaker for some and you must not continue this cycle of instruction. This is CLEARLY learned behavior.

My mother used to tell me:

“Once a task is once begun, never leave it till its done;
Be the labor great or small, do it well or not at all.”

The bottom line in that was that once your started, there was no stopping.  And the only option was doing your best.

If you want to quit something brother, NO ONE is going to stop you. People quit teams, they quit marriages, they quit on their kids, they quit when things get difficult. And you know what? Good!! Because in the long run the winners in life DO NOT WANT TO BE AROUND THE QUITTERS.

Son, you need to get where you want to be and stop being soft!  I don’t know you but I’m going to tell it to you straight.

Because the Army Rangers or the Marines is no place to find out that you are soft. I’ve hung out with Marines and people who are Army Rangers and I’m telling you…that these dudes are cut from a DIFFERENT cloth. If you are weak, chalk it up as being weak. If you no longer want to be soft and I don’t think that you do, then start sticking with things no matter how difficult they are.

The one thing that I have found which has really helped some clients who I’ve trained was preparing for a marathon.

I think such training will be helpful in your preparation for becoming an Army Ranger and I think it will be great for you to get out there on the pavement and stick with 26.2 miles even when you are hurting.

If you need my help, I will help you get there. Email me at info@rhadi.com and I’ll coach you across the line as I have done for many others.

I would also read the book The Ultramarathon Man by Dean Karnazes. That will provide you with a new perspective on what is or what isn’t possible.

And remember….Phil. 4:13

—————-
http://www.AskRhadi.com
—————–

If you have any questions for Dr. Ferguson please feel free to submit them to http://www.AskRhadi.com

Rhadi Ferguson, PhD, CSCS
2004 Olympian
4-Time National Judo Champion
JUST “GOOGLE ME!!”
http://www.rhadi.com
http://www.TheStrengthAndConditioningKing.com

P.S.
===============
Calling All Parents,
Teachers. Trainers,
and Coaches
===============
Parents, you must get Chump Repellent today. Do not hesitate, please get it today.  That way you can exterminate the chumpisms out of youth so that we can eliminate the Chumps of tomorrow.

Coach Ferguson
The Master Chump Reppeller
http://www.ChumpRepellent.com

…Questions answered from http://www.AskRhadi.com

Rhadi, I am a martial arts enthusiast, (grappling Muay Thai). But this question pertains to something I have deal with all my life. I have trouble concentrating. I get easily distracted. When I do I feel I am not as smart as the person beside me so I study extra hard to make the grade, pass the test. It’s always been like that and I have accepted it as such. I’m not shy of working hard, but geez eventually I would like to pass my CPA test on the first try. Any concentration, studying, tips you could give me?

Yes…without a doubt.

I’m sure you’ve heard of the immersion technique. You know, where you totally immerse yourself in a thing to force yourself to learn it. Such as going to Latin America and forcing yourself to learn Spanish because if you don’t ….. well….there is not “if you don’t.” You will or you won’t survive. Plain and simple.

Well, this is a technique that I use and you can use it too. If you have a problem with concentrating, a quick fix is to eliminate the things that are “pulling” your mental energies. Unplug the televisions, put yourself on a hardcore cell phone diet where you only check voicemails at a certain time and return calls at a certain time, stop reading the newspaper, do not listen to the radio UNLESS you are listening to a CPA study CD, other than that, SHUT EVERYTHING DOWN!!

This is how I finished my dissertation. I went so hard that I checked myself into a hotel room.

If you think about it, most of life’s greatest accomplishments are done in seclusion.  NFL football players go OFF to training camp, soldiers go off to boot camp, religious people go on retreats and fasts, and the leader of the Tour de France is usually in the mountains by himself.  Often times to get huge tasks done, this discipline is not necessarily in concentrating, the discipline is in knowing that you really don’t have the discipline to juggle everything that you want to and that you have to let some things go.

Often times this is hard to accept because we never want to see ourselves as being deficient. We always want to say things like, “I can handle it. I’ll be okay”, when it comes to the volume of things that we have in our day. When the truth of the matter is that no we can’t handle it.

Sometimes you have to strengthen your legs by weakening your load.  I know it sounds weird, but remember, strength is a “perceived” measurement. When you accomplish something great, people perceive you as being strong, when in essence you had to weaken yourself in order to strengthen yourself.  Thus the saying (from the scriptures) “when I am weak, then am I strong.”

So in a nutshell….Find those which you want to focus on. Focus on it.  Eliminate the things on the periphery and focus on the nucleus.

——————
Also… understand
this
——————

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
–Reinhold Niebuhr
And a good dose of Chump Repellent never hurt either – http://www.ChumpRepellent.com
—————-
http://www.AskRhadi.com
—————–

If you have any questions for Dr. Ferguson please feel free to submit them to http://www.AskRhadi.com

Rhadi Ferguson, PhD, CSCS
2004 Olympian
4-Time National Judo Champion
JUST “GOOGLE ME!!”
http://www.rhadi.com
http://www.TheStrengthAndConditioningKing.com

P.S.
===============
Calling All Parents,
Teachers. Trainers,
and Coaches
===============
Parents, you must get Chump Repellent today. Do not hesitate, please get it today.  That way you can exterminate the chumpisms out of youth so that we can eliminate the Chumps of tomorrow.

Coach Ferguson
The Master Chump Reppeller
http://www.ChumpRepellent.com

…Questions answered from http://www.AskRhadi.com

Keep ‘em coming

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Question
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I’m 18 and there is this girl that I met on MySpace and want to get to know her better. She doesn’t go to my school but knows some of my friends. I just don’t know how to approach her she is so beautiful. I’ve never had a problem with girls before it’s just something about her. Can U Help?

Well….thanks for your question.

Here’s what I gotta tell you. At 18 you should probably stop worrying about MySpace and get your own “space” J

And, “the girl” that looks so beautiful on MySpace may not be a girl at all. And she may look nothing like her profile pictures. This type of thing happens all the time where people put up fake pictures in order to “enhance” their person.

If you are really interested in social networking and meeting new people, I would encourage you to initiate a healthy and clean dialogue with this young lady.  Ask her what types of books that she reads and music that she listens to. Communicate with her outside of MySpace through your private email channels and phone channels.
Do YOUR homework and research. Perform the Google searches, ask her where she goes to school, where she went to school etc.   These types of things are very important.  When the time is appropriate allow her to speak with your parents and go from there.  Don’t rush.  And in all things, especially relationships…keep God First.    (Hey, you asked for my advice, that’s just what it is.)

—————-
http://www.AskRhadi.com
—————–

If you have any questions for Dr. Ferguson please feel free to submit them to http://www.AskRhadi.com

Rhadi Ferguson, PhD, CSCS
2004 Olympian
4-Time National Judo Champion
JUST “GOOGLE ME!!”
http://www.rhadi.com
http://www.TheStrengthAndConditioningKing.com

P.S.
===============
Calling All Parents,
Teachers. Trainers,
and Coaches
===============
Parents, you must get Chump Repellent today. Do not hesitate, please get it today.  That way you can exterminate the chumpisms out of youth so that we can eliminate the Chumps of tomorrow.

Coach Ferguson
The Master Chump Reppeller
http://www.ChumpRepellent.com

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Introduction
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I just got back in town yesterday after traveling and shooting a video with Jimmy Pedro. We are doing a 12 Month Newaza Coaching Program for Judo. It’s going to be absolutely extraordinary. It was cool working with Jimmy again. The last time that we worked together it was on the the Judo Scouting Reports project..  Before that we did Grip To Win, Grip Like A World Champion and Underground Gripfighting Secrets.  All of those projects really changed the Judo World and I don’t think that this one will be any different.

Traveling is a pain in the rear, but its cool to work with people that you enjoy, those who are honest, those who are not trying to get over on you and just geniune all around nice.

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In the airport….
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I do have some things that I really need to tell you today, but I must get past these few things first..

First off….

What in the world is going on with letting your pants hang halfway down your butt?

I’m not sure what style this is, but I am certainly glad that I didn’t get involved in it. It looks silly and dumb. I’m not sure who you know that does this but if you know someone that does this please tell them that Coach Ferguson said that you look like a CLOWN!!!  There is no teacher, professor, coach, mentor or person that I’ve ever held in high stature that wears their pants like this.  This is flat out dumb!!  Arrrggggggghhhhhhhh. I get so angry when I see this. And I have NO PROBLEM telling you that as an African American male that is just burns me up to see young black children doing this.  This is no way to present yourself publicly and is not the type of image to project…..AT ALL. So if you see some kid somewhere please say, “Young man, would you mind pulling your pants up?”

I had to get that off my chest…….Ghee Whiz! We gotta do better.

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In The Airport
At the Food
Court
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Now look here.

You KNOW BETTER!! Heck, even McDonalds serves salads now.

If you are a little bit heavier than you would like to be and you don’t plan on exercising today and you didn’t work out yesterday and your are probably not going to work out tomorrow…..then please, please, please DO NOT go to the food court in the airport and eat food like a pig at the trough!  Exert some discipline over your life. Get a hold of yourself……ALL OF YOURSELF….and do something different.

Yesterday it just hurt me to see one dude, who CLEARLY would have had a problem climbing up a flight of steps, order from Chik-Fil-A in the Orlando Airport and then slide over to the left and order 1/2 a dozen donuts from Krispy Kreme. That’s right, I said 1/2 a dozen. For those of you who didn’t attend Howard University, that’s 6 donuts!

He walked to his chair with about 4500 calories of food. Excuse me, did I say walk?  He kinda walked and waddled. You know that left to right upward shoulder hunch that you have to do in order to get some momentum. That’s what he did. And then he sat down and went to work.  Didn’t bless the food, didn’t do nothing. Just dug on in.  Mmmm mmm Mmmph.

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Okay….. so I was
on the plane
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Okay, I was on the plane coming back and I had the middle seat which is usually no problem, but this dude that sitting on by the window was out of order.

I was on the right side of the plane. So he was leaning to his right. But his butt was to the left. He didn’t have a full lean, just a lil’ gangsta lean. But he posted his left arm on the armrest.  So now part of his butt left cheek and his left arm in direct violation of the armrest code.

For those of you who don’t know this rule. This is the rule that states: The arm rest serves as the de facto line of separation of your area and the passenger who is adjacent to you. You should neither cross, abuse, or encroach upon the line without permission.

Clearly this dude was in violation.

So I said, “Ahem….Excuse me sir.  Uh…..er…um….. Do you realize that you are in violation of code 22 line 6 of the airplane rules of governance manual which clearly states that you need to be alllllllll they way over there and at no time should you be over here?”

Okay, maybe I didn’t say it like that, but I was thinking it.

What I said what, “Pardon me sir. They’re making these seats tighter and tighter these days. Would you mind giving me a little bit of wiggle room here.”

This dude acted like I was out of my mind.

So I did what everybody is supposed to do in this case.  I took off my jacket and while I was taking it off, I made sure that I bumped his arm, his rib, I moved his butt out of the way and everytime I hit him I said, “oh, I apologize, I’m sorry.”  But I made sure that he was in regulation and not in violation so that we could get the flight off the ground 

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30 for 30
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For those of you who don’t know what the 30 for 30 challenge is, please go to

>>>>> http://strengthking.rhadi.com/?p=568 <<<<<

For those of you that have been doing the 30 for 30, hang in there. You will see that its tough to stick to 30 days, but it will be sooooo rewarding when you finish.

And believe me when I say that the coaching and learning experience that you will receive is going to be phenomenal.

So keep it going.

and make sure that you follow me on Twitter at

–> http://www.Twitter.com/rhadi

If you are having problems staying on the 30 for 30, or you’ve already quit you know what you need.

So just go ahead and get it

>>>> http://www.ChumpRepellent.com

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Tomorrow is….
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Tomorrow is my birthday and……. I have a present for you.

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Closing
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Please make sure that you get your hands on Maximum Dumbbell Training. It doesn’t matter if you use, dumbbells, kettlebells or soup cans, Maximum Dumbbell Training has the exercises just for you. (those who use kettlebells have found this workout VERY helpful. personal trainers love it. The programs are already written for you).

Get Maximum Dumbbell Training Here

>>> http://rhadi.com/maximumdumbbell/

Take care,

Coach Ferguson